Stacks Magazine admin
Thursday, September 1, 2016
SM: Do husbands truly have an issue with earning less than their spouses?
PC: This is an interesting question. Yes, some husbands do, but in my counseling, I’ve found that wives may have more of an issue with their husbands earning less. Let’s face it. Money is power! Our society has made us to believe that. So when a man makes less, he may seem less powerful in the eyes of his wife, as well as in his own eyes. Honestly, as a man, I really don’t care if my wife makes more than I. In fact, I welcome it! Go honey; make millions! For us there is only our money, and we really believe this.
But there are many issues that can arise from differences in income. For example, if a wife makes substantially more than her husband, does she trust him having equal input in financial decisions? Will she try to encourage him to make more, even if he is happy with his job and lower income? Will he look at her with contempt because she is a bigger income earner than he? Will he feel he is still the “head of the household?” These just a few of the real issues that come from income inequality among spouses, yet most of these can be solved through counseling intervention and transparent and effective communication.
SM: How can couples make finances work in their relationship?
PC: There’s an old saying, “No romance without finance.” This could not be further from the truth. A couple should not strive to make finances the focus of their relationship. They should endeavor to make the relationship work through communication, openness, commitment and respect and financial success will be an outgrowth of that positive union. The main focus should never be on the finances, but rather on developing a lasting and honest love and respect for each other. This is where a lot of couples lose their way and ultimately their marriage.
A couple must learn that money is simply a tool to be used to better the union. The relationship should never become a slave to money. A couple should come together to determine whether they choose to invest their finances in stocks, real estate, mutual funds, annuities, etc. They should together decide on what to spend on vacations, supporting family members, etc. But in the end, it’s all about building their love relationship first. Their financial portfolio should always be much lower on the totem pole than their relationship.
SM: What can we expect to learn from the show?
PC: Since joining the show, it is my desire that the viewers will learn that love can grow through the most difficult of circumstances. These couples are legally married and I, along with the other experts, are giving them practical, advice and intervention that can really make a difference in their married and individual lives.
I would love to hear that someone was watching MAFS and it spoke to a situation that is currently happening in their lives and they found the answer to their issue. That would be great!
SM: What other projects you are working on?
PC: I’ve been pretty busy lately. My wife Wendy and I operate a marriage coaching business called Married and Naked, Inc. We are currently preparing for a major conference our company is hosting in Atlanta on October 14-16. This will be an awesome event for all couples, whether you’re married, planning to be married or dating. It’s filling up quickly, so we’re getting the word out now!
I’ve also been picked to appear on a spin-off of MAFS called “Second Chances.” We are helping Vanessa and David of Season 3 find love. It’s a fresh and innovative show about getting back into the dating world. It’s very exciting. So you can see me in a similar role on this show.
There’s more! In August I’m appearing in a few episodes of the new show, “Ultimate Staycation” on FYI. I help a couple learn closeness and cooperation while they have to stay inside a home, not able to go outside for an entire month! It’s a fun show.
I must mention, I am also the proud pastor of Progression Church in downtown Atlanta. See us on FB. We are a non-denominational church which thrives on building positive relationships, both with God and each other. In addition, Wendy and I also own and run three financial bartering franchises of Tradebank, Intl. also in Atlanta.
There are other projects in the pipeline that you’ll hear about soon. We are extremely busy, but I have to make the most of the time I’ve been given to be a blessing to all with whom I come in contact.
SM: How can people contact you for relationship advice?
PC: To register for the ‘Married and Naked’ conference or for comments or questions, please email me at email@example.com Or visit the website for information www.calvinroberson.com . You may also reach me on Twitter @calvinroberson or Facebook @calvinroberson or Instagram @Iamcalvinroberson.
I’m always anxious to hear from people who want to better their relationships. Wendy and I live by the mantra that “Relationships Matter.”
Be sure to tune in to “Married At First Sight” each and every Tuesday at 8:30pm EST on FYI!